Now at 50 when I look back, one question that comes to my mind is have I wasted time. The answer is yes. There have been so many instances when I could have used my time better. May be it was because I did not know back then what I know now. So even if I were to go back and try it all out again it will be the same.
When I look at my college times one thing I did not do was be serious about my future. I had no plan what so ever. And now looking back it feels so scary. May be the pre-internet era made me less informed… I don’t know..
But I think I should have spend my college time more wisely focusing on studies more and planning for the future. This does not mean I did not have fun. But I realize so much room for doing things better and differently. Will talk about that some time later.
Even on career and business and relationships and every other space in life I feel like wasted time. But one thing also becomes clear now. When I am 60 and I look back at my early 50s I am still going to have some regret. This thought pulls me straight into the present and grounds me firmly on today. What I have is Now and here…
What I do today matters. How can I do it in the best way… how can I ensure that I am not wasting time. What value is my action producing. Not just to me but also to others. Am I value driven when I do something? Things start revealing slowly… But it is not about living by the clock and calendar. But finding value.. meaning and purpose…. more on these in coming days….
I will leave you all with a thought “We can never make every single minute work perfectly as we want.. but we can strive to for ‘purpose in spending’ and ‘meaning in doing’ and ‘value in what is done’.