One interesting statement someone made to me a while back is that we are arguing and that we are in conflict and it is not good. They were right. They made that statement because we were truly arguing about something. And they also had the opinion that argument and conflicts are not good. Is it that simple?
I have worked with so many people who I did not fully agree with. How boring would life be with ‘Yes Sirs’ around you.
Wait! I know some people do prefer more ‘Yes Sirs’ around them. People who are not interested in the better and best but just their own ‘better and best’. But we do not learn from agreements. We learn and grow from disagreements.
If you have read Adam Grant’s ‘Think Again’ you will know by now. That makes me think that I need to read ‘Think Again’ again.. I love that….. Let me type that again. I think that I need to read ‘Think Again’ again. 😁
Adam says that conflict is good. And I agree !
People have conflict and disagreements because they are Thinking. Not just that they are thinking but they are also concerned about what is happening. Their move forward plan might be different from yours, but they are still Thinking about moving forward.
The issue though is that conflicts turn easily into arguments and finally die out without delivering anything of value. But Conflicts don’t have to be arguments. They can turn into conversations and continue bringing people and ideas together. Can’t they ?
I agree it is not easy and that is why we have arguments and not just conversations.
But how do we do that? How do we make more conversations happen ?
Start by asking if we genuinely want the conflict to turn into a conversation that might end up in us changing our opinion? If the answer is yes then we can do it.
If our answer is No, then every conflict is a chance for us to just argue till we succumb or the other person does. We cannot win alone, but we can lose together. But we should aim to win together. Isn’t that always better ?
So do we really want a conflict to turn into a conversation that might end up in us changing our opinion?
If Yes ! Let us Move Ahead !
Categories: Career, Career & Work
Leave a Reply